One of the most interesting aspects of Carolina Hurricanes Casino Night are the player baskets. Every year, players and coaches fill up baskets with some of their favorite items, autographed swag, and perhaps opportunities to spend time with them. Despite the approximate retail value of the items, they tend to be auctioned off for well into 4 figures, which is great, as they all benefit the Kids ‘N Community Foundation.

We were shocked when the Canes asked the Section328 crew to put together some baskets for this weekends Casino Night.  While we are sure that none of these will actually receive a bid (or even exist in real life), it was fun pulling them together.

The Flanagan Basket:

  • A copy of Too Fat To Fish autographed by author Artie Lange because every fat guy needs inspiration that there is someone out there worse off than him.
  • One year’s supply of Ricola lozenges to coat your throat from trying to keep up with Mike talking so much
  • Bomber of Evil Twin Brewing Even More Jesus because beer is a religion in 328
  • PS4 controller w/ the sticks chewed off by a puppy signed by Derek Roessler.  It shows the frustration in trying to beat Derek in NHL 15 or 16
  • Copy of NHL16 for XBoxOne signed by Steve Halko, because Flanagan can never score either.
  • Two tickets to sit in Section 328 because, I mean, c’mon… it’s awesome
  • A ticket to the 328 Season Opening tailgate and a bye in the first round of the 328 Annual Cornhole Tourney.  Includes tutoring session by none other than the World Champs of the World Team of Mike and Derek prior to the tailgate.
  • One coupon to have Mike come to your work and loudly berate your most hated co-worker for 15 mins

The Cane_Alytics Basket:

  • A sixer of Bear Republic Racer 5 IPAs – smooth, citrusy, delicious!
  • A voucher for access to Cane-alytics’ very own bank card for a year’s worth of $5/month donations to the patreon supporting a fancy stats website of your choice. Whether it be, Corsica.Hockey, or another fancy stat, fancy website. The choice is yours!
  • An adorable, standard normal distribution plushie! Displaying standard normal distribution plushie.jpg
  • An 8′ by 10′ glossy of John-Michael Liles, signed by me
  • A copy of Chvrches new album, Every Open Eye, which was my most played album of the past year.
  • Download codes for PS4 copies of Fallout 4, biggest time sink (aside from Twitter) of the past 6 months, and The Witness, which is the best and most innovative puzzle game I’ve played since Myst!
  • A copy of Essex County, a graphic novel by Jeff Lemire, which is considered one of the most important Canadian books ever and one of my personal favorites. Melancholy and only semi-related to hockey, it a quiet look at what life is like in rural Ontario, and it’s great.

  • A decorative voucher good for one real life meet-up where you either A) lay into me about how dumb Corsi is, how I don’t even watch the games, and that I tweet too many damn graphs, B) tell me my graph-posting is appropriate and Corsi fun-times can be enjoyed by all, or C) just hang loose and enjoy some brews.

The Roessler Basket

  • Physical copy of HBO’s “Michigan vs. Ohio State: The Rivalry.” It’s the one game a year that’s shaped how I view sports.
  • A complete lineup of Wicked Weed’s Angel Series. Even if you don’t like sours, I’m pretty sure these could convert you.
  • NHL 16 on Xbox One. Likely my biggest time sink, and almost the only video game I play.
  • Blu-Ray copies of Pulp Fiction, Monty Python and the Holy Grail, and The Princess Bride- my three favorite movies.
  • A copy of I Judge You When You Use Poor Grammar. If you’ve met me, you know I’m a badge-carrying member of the Grammar Police.
  • Bottle of Roessler Pinot Noir, signed by me. Sadly this winery was purchased a few years ago and is now Walt Winery.
  • Cam Ward’s glove
  • Voucher to slap Darcy Tucker. He’s yet to agree to this one, but we’re working on it.
  • Invitation to watch Wrestlemania with the 328 crew. You may not like wrestling, but I’m confident you’ll be entertained.

The Workrate Basket

  • One (1) six-pack Ballast Point Grapefruit Sculpin. If I could only have one beer in my fridge, it’s this one.
  • Several (several) packages Nongshim ramen products (Shin Ramyun, Shin Ramyun Black, Neoguri, Chapagetti, Kimchi). Not all ramen is cheap and sucks. Some of it is delicious, like this stuff.
  • One (1) “Breakfast of Champions” novel by Kurt Vonnegut. The book that got me back into reading and writing, because I realized that literature didn’t have to be stuffy, pretentious crap.
  • One (1) “Identity Crisis” graphic novel, written by Brad Meltzer, art by Rags Morales & Michael Bair. I’m a DC guy, sorry. This is one of my favorite arcs. Dark but really well written.
  • One (1) Owen: Hart of Gold Blu-ray. My favorite North American wrestler.
  • One (1) Jushin “Thunder” Liger wrestling mask. My favorite Japanese wrestler.
  • One (1) XBox One, One (1) gaming headset, and One (1) copy of NHL 16. Come join us on EASHL. Unless you suck.
  • Two (2) bags Ruffles “All Dressed” chips. Their rarity makes them taste even better.
  • One (1) “Firefly Package” – Blu-rays of Firefly (The Complete Series), Serenity, and a Jayne Hat of your very own. “A man walks down the street in that hat, people know he’s not afraid of anything.”
  • One (1) pair of black Chuck Taylors (w/red laces), personally worn & signed by me. They’re dirty, but that’s their charm.
  • One (1) invitation to get the “Workrate Experience” at an upcoming Carolina Hurricanes game. Come early, meet the Section 328 crew, tailgate, lose at cornhole, drink beer, then sit in Section 328* and have fun! (*disregard the fact ticket may read “Section 314”)