Ask Your Doctor About Chronic Cam Ward Syndrome
(ed. note: I wrote this before last night’s clunker of a game in which Eddie Lack was less than good.)
Hi friends (and sworn enemies). Have you been feeling uneasy whenever your favorite hockey team takes the ice? Unsure if seeing them score four goals will be enough to secure a win? Fearful of Twitter fan meltdowns while local media throws gas on the fire and walks away? Chances are you may have Cam Ward as your franchise goaltender. While there’s no known cure for this condition, there are some common symptoms to watch out for.
Poor goaltending is one of the most common complaints hockey fans hear. Much of the time it’s caused by poor defense, an off-night, one bad rebound, or an occasional soft goal. Typically, bad goaltending goes away with the next game, or even the game after. Sometimes, this continues not just for several games, but several months or years. For some, these symptoms may continue with the same man in net for years on end. In these rare cases, you may have Chronic Cam Ward Syndrome.
Common symptoms of Chronic Cam Ward Syndrome include:
- Having a save percentage below the league average for five consecutive years
- Fifth-worst Goalie Point Share among goalies with 150+ starts since 2011
- Lowest percentage of quality starts among goalies with 150+ starts since 2011
- Third lowest save % among goalies with 150+ starts since 2011
- Signing him to a multi-year deal despite all of the above
If these symptoms persist, please consult your general manager. If he’s not available, or just not taking your calls, fire up those thumbs and tweet away.
While we’re talking Twitter, it seems that some aren’t happy that fans aren’t as quick to applaud Cam as we are to criticize him.
*Does twitter search for Cam Ward*
— Adam Gold (@AGoldFan) November 6, 2016
Gee, I wonder why fans aren’t busy fawning all over Cam Ward at this point. Maybe we’re fatigued from years of well below average play from him. Maybe we’ve seen too many sub-.900 performances to get excited about the times he plays like a capable goalie. Maybe one good game doesn’t offset a string of bad ones. Good for Cam, he’s turned in two nice games in a row. He’s still at a .888 sv% this year.
I can hear someone yelling “OH WHAT, IS EDDIE LACK ANY BETTER!?” in the distance. My answer is simply “we don’t know.” Eddie Lack hasn’t been given any measurable run in his time here. Has he gone out and stolen the job? Absolutely not. But when the guy in front of you has consistently proven he’s no longer The Dude, why not try something new just for the sake of trying something new? Pat went into much more detail, but the asset mismanagement of Eddie Lack is damn near comical. I believe I have this timeline right:
- Acquired from Vancouver
- Signed a two-year extension before ever playing a game
- Assigned a goalie coach who changed his playing style for… reasons.
- Stunk up the joint in his first few games, certainly having nothing to do with ↑
- Played the rest of the season with a shorter leash than Cam despite being roughly as bad.
- Was brought into a game in which Cam was pulled only to sit the next game. Spoiler: we lost that one too.
- Has toiled in purgatory for as long as Cam’s been healthy ever since.
Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. Fool me for five seasons, shame on you and the team that re-signed you.